Is It Rude to Tell a Friend Your Negative Opinion?

“If someone asks you for an opinion on something, but you give a negative opinion, is that being rude?”

Great question, Pia!

The Bible tells us to be truthful people—that means we should be known for telling the truth. But we should also be kind and helpful when telling the truth. God delights in truth (Psalm 51:6). And the Bible tells us that even when we have to tell hurtful truths to our friends, that’s better than flattering people (Proverbs 27:6).

Someone who asks you for your opinion may really be asking different questions. Sometimes they really want validation (not just for vanity). “Do you like my new haircut?” “Does this dress look pretty on me?” are questions that you should find a positive response to. Even if you don't like the dress, for instance, you could say, “I do like the color, but this other dress seems to suit you better.” After all, even wearing a dress or hairstyle that's not “just perfect” isn't a thing to be overly concerned about.

At other times, people are asking for your true opinion or may need it, and your true opinion might be negative and could be very important! Perhaps a friend is about to give a speech and some facts aren't correct! Your friend would appreciate you helping fix the mistake. But even when your opinion is negative, you can express it in ways that avoid hurting people’s feelings. If you’re expressing a negative opinion, try to also find something positive to say.

For example, if someone asks you to look at their school assignment and they didn’t do a very good job on one part, but they were overall very creative, you could compliment them on their creativity and give them an opinion about what they could do to improve their assignment.

Sometimes people know that what they’re asking about isn’t good, and they’re looking for help to identify what is wrong. Your perspective might be important for helping them learn!

The Bible tells us to be truthful because God is truth. We belong to him, so we should reflect his truthful nature.

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